To Serve

Between January and March I spent a lot of time in the hospital, mostly visiting my husband who either needed an emergency surgery, was suffering a fatal something or other, experiencing painful side effects of treatment... all in all I was in the hospital with him (or myself) on probably 17 different occasions, some of which I've tried to forget. Praise God, Phil hasn't been back to the hospital for an emergency since then.

On each of those 17 visits I remember a sense of panic that I didn't want Phil to think he was alone, to know that he was loved- and so it was with urgency that I would rush to whichever room he was in. Of course I was comforted that he was already in the hospital so any care he needed would be administered, but I was worried about his emotional health. Having been treated in a hospital myself, I remember clearly the presence of loneliness as I sat in the room, wondering who, if anyone, would come through the door next. Even an hour by myself felt like a dark existence of despair. It was that memory of being so lonely that I didn't want Phil to experience.

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I've been reading books lately, usually have 2 or 3 going at once, and the pages of each are filled with testimonies of community overcoming individual darkness. In a couple books, there are stories of visiting victims of disease in their dying moments, and sensing a power of hope midst despair. It was reading these pages where I realized I've missed something huge in my own life. A disappointment flooded me and visions of visiting Phil in the hospital overwhelmed my thoughts. I remember being in the ICU with him in the small hours of morning, his parents also there. And then around that memory I see all the other ICU rooms, the floor quiet except for heart monitors and breathing machines. Hardly any other visitors were there.

I had missed 17 different opportunities to serve.

I wish I had stepped outside my selfish desire to be with Phil and visited the sick that had no one. I don't have any memories of visiting victims of illness in their affliction, other than family. I don't reach out to strangers who are probably experiencing the darkness of despair and loneliness. How hard would it have been for me, on those 17 occasions, to walk in to the room next to Phil's and offered to serve someone with another pillow? Or a cup of apple sauce? I easily did it for Phil, I'm sure it would be just as easy to do it for someone else.

Everyday we miss opportunities to serve others that are in our life. The slow old man at the grocery store who takes forever picking out his lettuce, I bet I could help him!

In my Christian faith we believe that God made Himself a man to serve humanity, that we might do the same. "Love your neighbor as yourself", it's all about service.

I'm going to do my best this week not to miss opportunities to serve those around me.

Will you join me?

Ever hopeful,
Dalene

P.S. please sign the petition from our previous post!